Algumas regras básicas que todos os homens devem seguir para se tornarem bons exemplos da nossa espécie.
- Puxar o catarro da alma, a qualquer momento. O catarro de um macho de verdade deve ter consistência, ser espesso e verde;
- Coçar-se no meio das pernas periodicamente, e ter certeza que os outros sabem que você coçou;
- Usar palavrão sempre que for desnecessário;
- Jamais use plural em substantivos. Ex: um real, dez real.
- Não deixe que ninguém veja você bebendo leite (ou Fanta, principalmente Fanta Uva). Caso isso aconteça, você pensou que fosse caninha.
- Sente de pernas abertas. Tenha orgulho do que Deus lhe deu;
- O sentido da vida está em provar a virilidade;
- Pense duas vezes antes de fazer qualquer coisa. Uma com cada cabeça;
- Use sempre camisa regata ao voltar da academia de ônibus;
- Leia apenas o caderno de esportes e queime o resto do jornal. Se você tocar no suplemento feminino, mesmo que acidentalmente, será amaldiçoado;
- Se você estiver no shopping e passar em frente a uma TV que transmite futebol, pare tudo, cruze os braços, incline a cabeça para trás. Comente os lances importantes com quem estiver ao seu lado ” Puta, que bolão!!!”. Xingue o Luxemburgo, fale da mãe do juiz, faça comentários maldosos sobre as irmãs dos jogadores e vá embora.
- Seu carro é mais importante que a sua mulher;
- Coce o nariz em público. Se nao tiver ninguém por perto, espere alguém chegar;
- Procure saber o nome de todos que trabalham no boteco, isso dá moral;
- Tenha certeza de que o começo de sua bunda esteja visível ao alcance de todos;
- Se você vir outro de sua espécie, arrote para delimitar seu território;
- Tenha sempre a unha do dedinho mínimo grande para poder limpar a orelha e o nariz na hora em que voce achar que estam sujos ou tiver alguém vendo. O que acontecer primeiro
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